Friday, February 1, 2013
nostalgia has me in its grips thanks to a student comment
"Mrs W is right about Yellowstone, its like standing on the crust of hell and being in heaven at the same time." Right now? That comment has me thinking. We checked in to our hotel last night, my mom, Kenny's mom and I, expecting that there would be a roll away and finding out that it was against fire codes. Someone had to share a bed. I spent the night next to my mom, probably for the first time in 40 years. I remember as a kid I was allowed to crawl into bed with my mom as long as I was still. It's funny, last night I slept with frozen posture. As I sit and wait for my companions on this journey, I am in reflecting on that Yellowstone comment, the reminder from a dear colleague that my students are in HS and despite the capability of reaching for the stars, the are just babies. Then there is my own venture into a new medium. How fitting that I showed them that Annie Liebovitz photo of Old Faithful. The summer, 2011, I stood on the crust of hell I had high hopes of setting up studio space in Utah only to realize the the schedule requirements were too much for me to fit any time in. My hand was forced. It would be pen, sketchbook and point and shoot. Oh how I hated photography and oh how much I learned with a few glimmers of possibilities. I took 3500 photos. I had maybe 100 I liked and out of them I culled a dozen. One of my best was of the geyser field in Yellowstone. I am here in MN a good camera in hand, hoping to eventually match that Yellowstone moment. I spent the evening sharing looking at my photos of Germany. There are only one or two I like but the emotional ties to that family experience coupled with the music I am being forced to listen to now (urban cowboy soundtrack) have me wrapped in this blanket of nostalgia. When Urban Cowboy was released I was in HS, hoping to study art in college, my dad was still around and at the time he would play it over and over. Wrapped in nostalgia as I realize how old my mom has become. How she is facing her own mortality on a regular basis and yet trying not think about it. She is also dealing with and saddened by her brother's decline. She and my uncle were close when they were kids. I can't help thinking its one of those important times in life that I must pay attention. Nostalgia has woken me up this morning and has reminded me to pay attention!